Winter mornings are always a windy affair and my super cozy blue jacket and scarf provide perfect combat for the chilly breeze. I had specially picked the blue shades as you adore blue.
And there was this extra warmth that they provided that day… perhaps… as I was set to live what I had longed for days… a return awaited.
I rang the door bell…it was still early dawn…n I felt a bit dizzy due to the prolonged flight. I heard the cling of wind chime hung above the door… and there you were…dressed in a crisp white shirt…paired with stonewashed blue denims.So untouched… so real…
Wearing your favorite fragrance and as it pulsed around…I completely gave in to tantalization. I could feel the rustic vibe in the apartment. It kind of brought me back to the old memories…brought me back to normal. Your gentle peck and the soft red couch added the required comfort….and as you settled for the newspaper to get a glimpse of the worldly updates, the verbal exchange got more casual…
You went into the kitchen to brew some coffee and meanwhile, I got myself engaged into a tour down the moments of celebrations.
The living wall was royally striking in electric blue, something where our thoughts finally met and we painted it together…right next was the bedroom door, turned into a collage of memories, full of our pictures …it appealed to ‘us’….so special and so close to our hearts. The bedroom wall bore the beautiful painting we had hand picked from the flea markets, bargaining down the 5k asset to just 3500 bucks…just to fit it in our budget…it rebounded back all the fantasies….we were crazy…I agree…
The coffee mug that I gifted you after our first date still served as the pen holder …the bedcovers still wore a blend of your after shave and my cologne…..
The wall clock belled 6 am and suddenly it struck me….how could I forget my heaven…I clumsily hurried to the balcony…I loved this place…the white swing, bright pink blooming roses…all with the rising sun in the background….it always seemed massively beautiful….as if it was designed intricately so only the two of us could live the fascination….or shall I say…It rose with so much grandeur so that it could witness our love and ink it immortal in riots of reds and yellow….without mention…always accompanied by the aromas of your filter coffee
As I turn back to return to the couch ….I see you standing near the swing….holding our piping hot coffee mugs, looking every bit of my adorable husband….that chocolaty smile overflew affection…melting into your arms was never less securing….
How could I let this dream get stirred for even a millisecond…I had to lie about my chemo. Hide it over a work trip, get well soon and join you again in this most mesmerizing journey. Keeping it perfect, not to miss it again and as you say “absence does make the heart grow fonder”….I learned to conquer all the pains over the serenity of being ‘US’.
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